Dear Diary…

dear-diary

As of today, two years, 2 months and 11 days…

There was a time when feelings floated along the surface, fading as quickly as the rain clouds vanished after a storm. Never lasting more than a few moments in time. Emotions were never so deeply embedded. Seconds were never given their due importance and time just swept along, mindlessly spent as the days drew to a close.

Over the years all that has changed as drastically as the seasons come and go. Memories are now so preciously stored, and life which once so precariously balanced on the edge is savoured and cherished.
Distance has taught the hardest lesson of all. Fondness for those who are absent has increased so out of proportion that words are often insufficient to explain the explosion of feelings experienced.
The value of people and the difference they make in your life, the way a person touches you from the inside making them so impossibly hard to let go of, and the very fragility of life are all emotions so anew and foreign.

But perhaps the hardest lesson of all is that of attachment. Of how an attachment can break you down, confuse you beyond belief and suck the very life out of you when mishandled. How the obsessive thoughts of one person or people can render you incompetent. How your heart can become plagued by them, causing a deep-rooted dissatisfaction.
Above all, how dangerous an attachment can be. How hard it becomes to rid yourself of it and begin life all over.. For nothing can cause pain, like that of giving up a part of yourself you wanted to keep as yours alone forever.. but can undoubtedly never have.

nadia nawaz

When words run dry

His words washed over her, wrapping themselves around her like a cloak while at the same time cutting a gaping hole through her very core. She gathered her arms around her and breathed in. The power of his words was relentless and she could do nothing but yield to them, captivated and mesmerised by their force. Continue reading

Wild like the wind

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A tide of thoughts crashed against the shore of her mind, overlapping one another  continuing in a fast succession unwilling to cease despite her incessant attempts to block them out.

Each thought carried with it a memory, creating a fuzzy warmth so rapidly overcome by an unmerciful cold.

Completely overwhelmed and engulfed by this confused crash of swiftly changing occurrences within her mind, she drifted through time in a blur.

Moments melted into hours, hours drifted into days and days transitioned into weeks. Time swept her off her feet and in a regretful daze she travelled through, watching it seep through her fingers yet somehow always at a loss on how to keep up..

nadia nawaz